Teddy Kennedy: Alito influenced by Goldwater presidency

Senator Ted Kennedy, demonstrating the effects of 50 years of hard drinking and womanizing as well as a firm grasp on history, declares that the 14 year-old Samuel Alito was unduly influenced by the Goldwater presidency.

"This nominee was influenced by the Goldwater presidency," he said. "The Goldwater battles of those times were the battles against the civil rights laws." He added, thunderously, "Not until the Timothy Leary and Norman Rockwell presidencies were we able to throw off that heavy cloak of conservative racism and get face masks added to football helmets."

Well, I added the part about the face masks.

TAGS: Ted Kennedy, DT's, liver damage, Samuel Alito